The weight of weight...

It's taken me a while to get my head around this post.
Not as long as it took for my mid-rift, thighs, back and face to become more round.

"The Road Back" to now has it's progress steeped in the success of my H2O or H3O approach.
"Is this choice/thing/action going to Help me Or Hinder me?"
The key to this is being super Honest with yourself.

More honesty than help or hinder follows.

The short version - 3 years condensed into 3 minutes:

My weight become a weight.
I was getting heavier and bigger and fatter.
I was aware of that.
The scales started to show me every day.
Clothes weren't fitting me.
I started to look fat in the face.
My belly-button disappeared.
  Was it going to collect lint?
I developed a decent roll around my stomach.
That roll was showing through some (looser fitting) shirts.
Others saw it. I saw them see it.
My abs turned in to an ab then flab.
I started to think about diabetes, high blood pressure, and heart-problems.
The health stories and issues of others rang louder with me.
My quads turned into a quad and then a thigh.
Any muscle definition I had disappeared.
I did a bicep-flex one day...nothing, donuts, zilch, naddah, nought, kapput!
I became self-conscious.
My arthritic toe and hip were getting worse.
My shoulder was no better.
Things weren't healing. I was in pain all the time.
I couldn't do a chin-up, a push-up, a sit-up, a dip, a lunge.
I was smiling less.
I couldn't walk (initially), run, ride or swim.
My competence and self-confidence fell.
My shopping, food-preparation, cooking and eating habits got worse.
   That's not true....I made them worse!
I was a role-model (in my eyes) for others, and providing guidance on health, fitness, training. professionalism and performance - and have been 30 years.
This had me question my professional integrity...especially as I was setting-up a new high performance business!

People were commenting, "good to see you with same weight on Fordy", and "are you going through a bulking phase?"

Oh, puh-leez, I was just getting fat, heavy & big.

And let myself become lazy about doing something about it.

Sure some medication(s) contributed. But I made more poor choices.



It didn't matter how others spun it, I wasn't going to spin away from the truth, the reality.
I began toquestion if I'd "given up", accepted being 50+, and could be happy fitting-in to many of the low standards and mediocrity around me.
Those thoughts didn't do much for my self-concept.
And, i'd become a little unhappy. 


My weight increase was weighing me down.
  In reality (and upon reflection) the consequences of choices had begun to weight me down.

Than a switch.
Driving home from the two specialists on December 15th (2017) I reflected on parts of my conversation with them...
* when the weight goes..."
*when the weight drops..."
* when I get the weight down..."

It struck me...I've given up responsibility for my weight gain.
I gave "the weight" it's own identity, and that was responsible for my malaise and deterioration.
I'd developed a habit-of-mind where i'd divorced myself from the reality of my own doing and was simply blaming "the weight".
MY issues had become about "when" - the future, not the here-and-now.

Neither of them represent me, nor what I'm about.
Screw that!!

I spent the weekend contemplating, and then planning.
I emailed it one of my specialists early Monday morning.

Although I'd made small in-roads into kicking some habits, I got to it - action - the very next day, Saturday.

I'm not a believer in waiting for Monday, tomorrow, next week, next month, next time, or the New Year.

Action and concomitant progress and results wait for nothing.

It became "The Road Back".
Another 3 year journey.
This time to health, fitness, and training, and ultimately, a return to competition.

I'd 'planned to lose the first 10-11 kgs over 12 months.

Well...things change!

And, here I am 11 weeks and 1 day later, and 9-months ahead of schedule ... I've made progress:
11.2kgs lighter.

Although there is much to go - and curve-balls yet to come - the progress is what I am proud of.

Favourite clothes and new clothes fit.
I'm walking, riding, chinning squatting. lunging, and swimming. and other stuff.

Importantly I'm feeling better, and feeling a little better about myself.

My quads are back.
My belly-button is back.

And...no lint!